WDS (Wannabe Dom Syndrome)

A wannabe (slang for "want to be") is a person with an ambition to be someone or something that she/he is not. The term is pejorative and intends to convey the foolish nature of the desire due to the incompetence of the "wannabe" to accomplish the goal (source wikipedia). So are all just fakers and posers.

There are lot of wannabe's in SL but the most striking is the Wannabe Dom. There are 10 types of wannabe Doms:

• The "I Am Dom Hear Me Roar" Dom: All shiny new leather wear, with a belt full of toys (just bought at Jack's Whip-O-Rama). Of *course* he knows what to do! He read SM101.
• The "I Just Wanna Get Laid" Dom: Roams the halls of SL sending IMs to the ladies in the Chateau telling them "On your knees! I am a Dom and you ARE my slave!".  Wants to collar someone (ANYONE!) to fulfil the prophecy of his deluded elitism. Pines to belong to the clique.
• The "Dungeon Slut" Dom: Has a new 'lady love' each day (sometimes 2 or 3 a day). He swears each time that *this* one is his 'eternal true love'....at least for the next two hours.
• The "Psycho-Stalker" Dom: Wants to know *exactly* what you do...every minute of the day and night. Insists on BCCs of all sent mail, and Forwards of all read mail, wants access to your account to check up on you. Do you get the feeling that someone is watching you? With this one, you're probably right.
• The "I Just Wanna Be Your *Friend*" Dom: Offers to guide you and protect you....you innocent sweet lil thing you.  Ohh, those other 10 subs? Just friends. Really.
• The "Of Course I'm Dom...I'm an Alpha male!" Dom: Warning signs: Hides behind a number of alts of BOTH genders, with a donkey and a goat thrown in for good measure, oh ...and don't forget the 'toad'. "SL and RL are completely separate and shall remain that way". Whines, a lot.
• The "I'm Not *That* Type Of Dom" Dom: Squeaky-clean image. The type of Dom who everyone *knows* is a good guy. He would never do something less than up-front and honorable. Uhohh... Totally transparent!
• The "Tom Cruise" Dom: He's young,rich, handsome (ahumm)  and perfect....until you meet him in person. Then you find out that the 'Tom Cruise look-alike' you've been subbing to is 5'4", 400 lbs, bald, 50 years old, and living with his elderly mother. (Ohh yeahh... and he works as a clerk at 7-11...not as a CEO of a 'major corp'). Or….does not work at all…not because of any early success but more because....he's an all round..under-achiever.
• The "Alex I'd Like to Buy a Clue For $200" Dom: Ok, so you've got a sub (coughs)....now what?
• The "I Don't Have A Sub Bone In My Body" Dom: Really a bottom at heart, just refuses to admit it...even to himself.

The sign of a true Master is that he NEVER includes self-promotion of His manliness. He exudes His strength from EVERY pore, every tacit response, every gaze, His ENTIRE demeanor.

N.B.
This one is written with someone that wants to stay anonymous. Got her permission long time ago.

RTS (Rabbit Teeth Syndrome)

Rabbit teeth grow continuously throughout their lives. Normal chewing action and grinding of tooth against tooth wears them down to just the point that they don't overgrow.This picture shows you a clear example of
the overgrown Rabbit Teeth syndrome in SL. It seems to occur most with women in SL.

This means that the persons suffering RTS in SL don't take very good care of themselves in RL. They spend probably way too much time on their ass eating chips, burgers and other junk food. Besides suffering RTS they are or become obese and wheezy.

People with overgrown rabbit teeth are lucky that they aren't disposed of, as some rabbits, or many of them would have been culled on early age.

To prevent overgrown rabbit teeth you should start a high fibre diet and get off your lazy ass.

As for the men meeting women with RTS in SL. Better keep your cellphone close in case you want to have sex with them.You'll need it to call 911 !!

PPS (Peno Pause Syndrome)

This syndrome isn't about the male menopause, called andropause. In European countries and the United States, andropause generally starts at 40 when most men are at the pinnacle of their careers, and a decline in the hormonal level has a negative influence on their careers as well as personal life.

The Peno Pause however kicks in with men at age 55+. Most of them are in a bad marriage in RL or in the middle of a divorce, don't have a regular job and not much else to go for. They feel frustrated and escape to SL to desperately look for what they lacked for a long time in RL. Hidden behind their avatar they transcend all forms of immorality. They become agressive and vulgar perverts and believe the world revolves around their own wants and needs and whims. They have a sick disregard for the universal law of "reaping what you sow" because they think it doesn't apply them or can negatively effect them.

Men suffering PPS are not always easy to recognise. Some characteristics are:

- Are online almost 24/7
- In their profiles you find text as "I don't give a shit", "Fuck off", "My sl not yours" etc
- The longer online the more alts they create. They think they're smart with creating
   opposite looking alts.
- Are often very vulgar in local as well in chat. They use a lot of "fuck" and " shit"
- They hit often on much younger women for ego boost
- They ask for pussy pics and spread cock pics around
- Some fall easier "in love" than you can blink with your eyes
- Some are big spenders in SL. Friends seem easy to buy in SL ^^

Last but not least.. they don't only start to look as punks but behave even worse. If you see a punk as shown in the pic in places like ballrooms etc you know you have to do with an "Old Punk". You really think a 20-25 yo guy would go to places like that? Go figure !

EHS (Excessive Hairiness Syndrome)

The Excessive Hairiness Syndrome is also known as hirsutism and refers to women with excess growth of terminal hair in a male pattern as seen on the pic. In this sense, hirsutism is one of the most common disorders in SL.

Regardless of the etiology, hirsutism can produce mental trauma and emotional anguish and can be viewed
as a presumptive loss of femininity.


The major objective in the management of hirsutism is to take always your shaver with you. You can buy them om marketplace. Southern European women who suffer most from hirtuism are advised to take their shaver everywhere they go in both SL and RL !

RCS (Revealed Coolness Syndrome)

In sl a lot of men try to look cool. But being cool isn't about dressing up your avatar the right way. The very definition of being really cool is being calm, composed, under control, not excited, indifferent, and socially adept. Often cool people are those that don't get excited about things, that don't always have to talk, unless they have something cool to say. The people who strive the hardest for coolness are sabotaging themselves by trying too hard.

The fake ones are easy to recognise in sl. Eventually they will show up as seen in this pic. Nothing cool about that... eh?

BZS (Blue Zebra Syndrome)

The Blue Zebra Syndrome is definitely one of the rarest syndromes you will come across in SL. With a normal zebra the black and white stripes are a form of camouflage called disruptive coloration that breaks up the outline of the body. Although the pattern is visible during daytime, at dawn or in the evening when their predators are most active, they look indistinct and may confuse predators by distorting true distance. The Blue Zebra however tries to achieve the opposite and wants to attract potential predators to get totally ravaged because they suffer the worst form of self-destructiveness. You better think twice before you im such person because you will get dragged into something way beyond your imagination.

DVS (Dummy Ventriloquism Syndrome)

Ventriloquism is an act of stagecraft in which a person (a ventriloquist) manipulates his or her voice so that  it appears that the voice is coming from elsewhere, usually a puppeteered "dummy".

Originally, ventriloquism was a religious practice. The name comes from the Latin for to speak from the stomach,  i.e. venter (belly) and loqui (speak). The Greeks called this gastromancy. The noises produced by the stomach were thought to be the voices of the unliving, who took up residence in the stomach of the ventriloquist. The ventriloquist would then interpret the sounds, as they were thought to be able to speak to the dead, as well as foretell the future (source: Wikipedia).

In SL you could say we're all more or less ventriloquists because we let our dummy (pixel doll) do the talking for us. However, this picture shows a clear example of the real Dummy Ventriloquism Syndrome in SL and I have only seen it once so far. This ventroloquist is taking it very literal and wants his dummy to put another dummy up in the stomach to let it do the talking for him. That really shows that this is a stupid person and has no common sense and no brain at all. A real dummy !

P.S.
Don't mistake this kind of dummy with the typical Baltimore girl that will suck anybody's dick, or have sex with them. Source: Urban Dictionary http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dummy